All that I can give

There was a song we used to sing at church camp.  The lines went something like, " This is all that I can say right now.  I know it's not much.  And this is all that I can give.  And that's my everything."  It was about being broken, yet coming to the feet of God with what little you had left.  That is exactly how I feel right now.  Today was a very bad day.  Really, it's been a bad week, but today was awful.  Today I hurt and was angry.  Today someone did something that challenged me in a way I never really wanted to be challenged.  A relationship is being tested, and to be honest I feel like I have been giving so much.  I have been doing everything I was supposed to do.  I laid it all at the feet of God more times than I can count, just praying for the strength to get through these challenges.  I have no idea why God has allowed me to be tested so much lately.  It seems unfair to deal with this in the wake of my miscarriage.  I am exhausted, yet fighting.   I have gotten so little sleep this week that I have caught a cold, and have started to lose my voice tonight.  I could really use a break from the hard stuff.  I need a chance to breathe and have hope again.  But for now I will give all that I have, and lay it at the feet of my Lord, even if there is very little left to give.
This is the only picture I have of Graesen today.  My family watched him for the majority of the boy and he was so exhausted that he crashed on the way home.

Please pray that I can get through this and come out stronger (whatever that looks like).  Pray for me to hold onto my faith and to remember what I am fighting for in the first place.  And please pray for me to able to love Graesen in a way that shields him from all of the hurt right now.